When Sober Curious Strikes Past Dry January

At the start of 2025, the previous US Surgeon Common issued an advisory on the hyperlink between alcohol consumption and cancer risk. Whereas it is a sobering name to motion, there is no such thing as a denying that sober curiosity has elevated not too long ago. From Dry January to extra manufacturers creating alcohol-free drinks to the rise of mainstream mocktails, now greater than ever even informal drinkers have gotten sober curious and analyzing their relationship with alcohol.

Final yr in Episode 146 of the FBG Podcast, Sobriety Coach, and Founding father of Sober Wild, Krysty Krywko, Ed.D, joined our EIC Alison for an interview on sobriety. Right now we’re persevering with this dialog with Krysty. Dry January has handed however definitely not the questions on what we will do if we’re fascinated with a sober (utterly alcohol free), or damp (a discount in alcohol consumption), life. 

Tam: Ought to we method ingesting as all or nothing, particularly if we’re sober curious?

Krysty: I believe it’s a really private choice, however in the event you’re any form of a daily drinker (which means three or 4 nights per week “simply to unwind”) then alcohol is impacting the way in which you’re feeling – mentally, emotionally, and bodily – your physique simply doesn’t know there’s one other manner. In case you’re not ingesting throughout the week, however then ingesting a few bottles of wine over the weekend, you by no means actually get the possibility to see how your physique and thoughts reacts to no alcohol. Anna Lembke, in her e book, Dopamine Nation: Finding Balance in the Age of Indulgence, talks about how “abstaining from our drug of selection for at the very least 4 weeks offers clarifying behaviors. Perception that merely just isn’t attainable whereas we proceed to make use of.” In different phrases, you haven’t any concept how shitty you actually really feel while you’re utilizing a substance that’s making you’re feeling shitty. It normally takes just a few weeks on your physique to regulate to the truth that you’re not consuming a poisonous substance.

Tam: Are there issues/greatest practices to go from Dry January to extra of a Damp February and past? 

Krysty: So, I don’t actually know the reply to that query, it actually relies on what your motivation was for Dry January. Was the plan to only see in the event you may make it with out ingesting for 30 days? Or had been you searching for actual well being advantages? Or did you understand that your ingesting has elevated over the previous few years and you realize you wanted to take a break?

Moderation, which is basically what Damp February is all about, doesn’t work for lots of people. In case you spend loads of time bargaining with your self each time alcohol is concerned, which results in loads of “guidelines” round your ingesting, you would possibly wish to take a step again.

You may not even concentrate on these guidelines. They’ve simply turn out to be a part of your internal chatter. That chatter would possibly sound like this:
I’m not going to drink on my own.
No ingesting earlier than 5:00 p.m.
No laborious alcohol throughout the week
I’m solely going to drink white wine (or beer, or vodka, and so on.)
I can’t have greater than two drinks on per week night time.
I can’t drink greater than two nights in a row. 

The top days of my ingesting had been crammed with elaborate and arcane guidelines that had been consistently shifting as I broke one after one other. I used to be letting myself down day by day, and that form of self-disappointment was like a relentless stream of micro-cuts to my soul.

Take a second and take into consideration why you’re placing so many guidelines round your ingesting. You would possibly simply resolve that it’s not value it.

Tam: If somebody is studying this considering “I don’t have an issue with my alcohol consumption however wish to take a extra conscious method to what I eat/drink,” what questions ought to be explored when fascinated with alcohol consumption? 

Krysty: One of many first issues we have to do is transfer away from the language round ingesting and the assumption that there are “downside drinkers” after which everybody else. This results in disgrace, stigma, and judgement.

A way more helpful, and lifelike, mannequin to make use of in the case of speaking about alcohol is the thought of ingesting occurring on a spectrum. That’s the place the thought of “grey space drinker” emerged from, which encompasses everybody from the every-now-and-then drinker to those that are bodily hooked on alcohol. The fantastic thing about this mannequin is that you just don’t must hit any kind of a all-time low earlier than you may discover your relationship with alcohol, you get to resolve at any level on the spectrum what’s best for you.

In case you’re able to get trustworthy with the position alcohol performs in your life, I might recommend sitting down with a pen and paper and answering the next questions. Get interested by your self, and take the time to reply truthfully. Don’t cloud your responses with disgrace, or judgement, or what your bestie goes to assume. That is about you and the one life that you’ve got, and whether or not or not you need a poisonous substance to play a job within the creation of that life. 

Is alcohol nonetheless working for me?
How is alcohol making me really feel?
What areas of my life has alcohol taken over?
Does ingesting align with the individual I’m now?
What would “future you” inform “current you” on this scenario?

Tam: What if our mates have gone again to ingesting after Dry January, however we try to proceed. Do you’ve gotten solutions/suggestions for methods to make this a part of my life-style with my ingesting mates? 

Krysty: You would possibly want to seek out new mates – haha. However, significantly, if your pals actually respect and help you within the selections you make in your life, then it shouldn’t be an issue. However, in the event that they’re frequently making an attempt to push you to begin ingesting once more, whining that you just’re not enjoyable anymore, or that one shot of tequila gained’t do any hurt, you then would possibly must rethink who you’re spending time with. It’s essential work out for your self what you wish to do with the time that you’ve got, and the folks you spend it with. 

Moreover, in case your pal group is closely immersed in ingesting tradition – which means most social actions revolve round alcohol – you then would possibly want to seek out some new peeps that love to do various things.

Tam: Any favourite “drink” hacks to interchange that Friday night time cocktail? 

Krysty: I’m essentially the most primary sober individual round – and I’m pleased with ingesting a seltzer on my sofa to unwind after a busy week. However, I do know that individuals have completely different wants, and I get that within the early days of going alcohol-free you may want one thing just a little extra thrilling. Fortunately, the alcohol-free market is on fireplace! There are such a lot of merchandise available on the market – assume flavored seltzers, glowing teas, alcohol-free beers, wines, and spirits, kombuchas – I actually may go on and on. I’m frequently impressed on the locations the place I discover alcohol-free drinks – Goal, Dealer Joe’s, Complete Meals, common grocery shops, and native alcohol-free bottle outlets are beginning to provide such all kinds. My solely warning is be intentional when utilizing alcohol-free merchandise, particularly issues like alcohol-free wine or beer. In case you’re downing a bottle of alcohol-free wine most nights of the week, it’s form of like ripping off one bandage and placing on one other, and also you would possibly wish to discover why you’re caught in the identical behaviors. 

Did you do Dry January this yr and preserve a dry or damp February? What’s your sober curious hack? ~ Tam